Do You Know My Name?

So, A couple nights ago I had this dream that Bruce was calling me by my mother's name, and some other name I no longer remember. I woke up, and woke Bruce up out of a dead sleep and said "Do you know what my name is?" and it took him a second, and he goes "Brooke?" and I go "You keep calling me by my mother's name." And after a few more seconds he goes "Melissa?" and I go "Yeah, and InsertOtherNameHere."and then without even thinking about it he goes "Oh. I'm sorry." And we go back to sleep.

The next morning I'm on my way to my final clinical evaluation and the above scenario just popped into my head... And I was like... Did that actually happen? That's weird... And then I forget about it. And then after my eval, (I got a 3.8 in my psych clinical for those of you who care) Bruce texts me to see if I want to grab lunch with him. So I head over to a restaurant by his work and grab a table. He comes in and sits down and we start chatting about our respective days, and after I tell him about my clinical eval the weirdness from the night before pops into my head again. So I ask him, "Did I wake you up last night?" And he goes "Oh thank God. I'm not going crazy. I was sitting at my desk today thinking about how weird a dream that was for me to be having." And then we burst into laughter. And I go "The best part of that is that you apologized." And he goes, "Well, That goes to show you, even in my sleep I still believe that you can be right, or you can be happy."

And since then it has led to a lot of harassing and facebook conversations like this...

What Is Going On

So... I have been off the internet a bunch in the past few months... A bunch of stuff has been happening in my life, and I need to just put it out there without having the people I love tell me what is right and what is wrong....

Bruce and I have been dating since the end of last December. I moved in with him on October 19th. We're living with his parents at the moment, and they are wonderful lovely people, who by all accounts seem to adore me. We're looking at buying a house together, and we couldn't be happier with each other.

Our room is an absolute disaster, I'm sitting on the floor as I type this, and... well, I'll just give you a visual of the mess...

Hello!

Honestly, I've cleaned it up quite a bit.... but there's still a long way to go. ( and that's only a quarter f the room... you should see the rest.) I'm actually supposed to be cleaning right now, but I have ADD and my meds haven't quite kicked in yet. (It's not that I'm avoiding the cleaning.... Nope. Not at all.)

Anyhow, my parents are angry I've moved out, they're mad that I'm dating Bruce, they're just all around mad. My mother is furious with my dad's parents for wanting to get to know Bruce, and has pretty much cut them out of her life, for which I feel terrible, but she has to realize that she doesn't control anyone's life but her own, and she can't. Bruce isn't a bad guy, he's actually the best guy I've dated. He loves and adores me, but also respects me and treats me as an equal, not something to be put on a pedestal and elevated to impossible heights, but also not as a fragile china doll. He knows I am capable of doing things, and respects that, and that's one reason why I love him.

Over the past year I've come to realize that the only things I can control are my own actions, and how I react to the things other people do. My mom has done some things this past year for which I was furious with her about, however I have forgiven her. I just hope that in time she learns to do the same. I wish things were different, and I wish that I could change them, but another thing I've realized is that I am not responsible for the actions of those around me, nor am I responsible for the happiness of those around me. I am only one person, I can't do everything for everyone else, and be happy myself. The best I can do is to do things that will make me happy and try to please others. Which is not to say that I don't do things for other people, I do, but I am no longer making myself a martyr for those around me. I have realized that I have to stop sacrificing my own happiness and self worth for everyone else, because then I am unhappy. There is a balance to all things and I've found my way to that balance. It is hectic and stressful and sometimes makes me freak out, but I'm becoming a better, happier person, and that is what life is really all about.

And so, I'll update when I can, with whatever I can. I hope you understand.

Happy Holidays Everyone.

Brooke

Something I'm working on in the (little) spare time I have.

I realize this may not be the most interesting thing to a lot of you, but it's what I'm doing right now, and since I haven't posted in a while, I feel like I should, and this is as good as anything else I could do right now. I'm making a photobook on Shutterfly for Bruce, to give to him on sweetest day. (Which is a holiday I vehemently oppose... It's a freaking manufactured holiday because there was a downward trend in sales one year... It's a Hallmark holiday... But, Bruce likes the idea, so, I'll participate.)

Anyhow, It's a book of the time we've been dating, and how we came to be dating. And this is a couple pages worth of writing I've done in it... Feel free to tell me if it sucks.

"So, how did we start dating?

   There was the possibility that I was going to move away I told you about it, and the next day,  we were hanging out, just doing what we usually did. We got food, we saw a movie, and then on the way back, you told me you wanted to date me. I was shocked. You were my best friend. You knew how weird I was, and why in the world would you want to date me? However I did like you, and we got along very well.

   Unfortunately I was in another relationship, and even though it wasn't going well, I couldn't just jump ship. So, we agreed that if in the future, if we were both single, and interested in each other still, we'd give it a shot.

   One week later, we went to the Maker's Faire at the Henry Ford Museum. Emily came with us, just to keep things from being awkward. Not that they weren't. I tried to set you up with jailbait, you flirted with a robotics team.

   For the rest of the summer I tried to set you up with various friends of mine, and it didn't work out... But as it turns out, that was for the best.

Our first date was Thursday, December 27th 2012. I remember being ridiculously nervous beforehand. The night before Amanda came over and helped me pick out an outfit. I actually spent about an hour getting ready beforehand... I even did my hair. (Which is a rarity as you well know.) I must have texted Amanda thirty times in the 2 hours before our date... She kept reassuring me everything would be fine, and that it would all work out.

I remember being so ridiculously nervous when you finally picked me up, I felt so awkward. I remember giving you a super quick hug hello, and then thinking 'Was that ok? Should I have hugged him longer? Should I have not hugged him? What the hell am I doing????' 

   On the way to dinner I think we talked a bit, but I don't really remember... I do remember thinking about how we were best friends and now we were on a date and if things didn't work, could we still be friends, and so on and so forth. When we got to the restaurant we started talking more, and then things got awkward again, because we already knew all of the things about each other that you would normally find out on a first date. Then we talked about how we didn't really have anything to talk about, because we knew everything about each other, and bitching about our significant others was off the table, because we didn't have any...

   After dinner when we were walking back to your car, I remember you looking at me and saying something along the lines of "One of us has to do something or this is going nowhere" and sticking out your hand for me to hold. I recall feeling anxious about it, and then somewhat giddy once our hands actually connected. It wasn't as though we had never touched each other before, but this time was different. I won't lie and say I felt some magical spark, but what I will say is that I felt happy for the first time in a long time. While we were walking I remember you enthusing about your new underwear, and how comfortable it was, which made me laugh, and I recall thinking that maybe things wouldn't be so awkward all the time. You opened the car door for me before walking around to the other side and opening your own door. I remember being surprised because nobody had done that for me before.

   We headed to the bowling alley, on the way I made fun of your projectile sports skills. You however won, seeing as I hadn't played in 2 years... Which was the same amount of time it had been since we had last gone bowling. (I will kick your ass if you want to go again... I'm less rusty now.) "

That's all I have so far... It's about 2 solid pages of writing in the book. I'm planning to finish it this week... actually I have to... School's starting again... Urgh... 

I may have lied a little...

When I said I'd be back to a more regular posting schedule, I may have lied a little... It has been crazy busy for me over the past few weeks, and I haven't had time to do much of anything really.  But Bruce was totally awesome yesterday. He sent me a text that said "I got you a thing"and had a photo attached...

That is Bruce's hand holding the book.

It's the most recent book from My Absolute Favorite Series.... He is the best boyfriend ever. Now I just have to find the time to read it.... :D

Costume Pieces- Halloween is a bit early this year...

Last post I mentioned that I was making my Halloween costume, and as it would happen, Bruce decided that we should do a couples costume. And since I'm already making mine he suggested he be the Mad Hatter. So, I'm making a costume for him too. I've already gotten a few pieces of his costume done.

Hat!!!

I made buttons for his cuffs.

Hat Pins!

  And a few of mine as well.

Bracelet. I started with the chain link one,
but then I found the bangle on clearance at Jo-Ann Fabrics
(Another wallet killer for me)
So now I'm transferring all the charms to the bangle.

Pendant for my necklace, which i still have to paint, and add a handle to.

However none of the super important stuff... Like the actual outfits... urgh... Oh, well I kinda have the corset for my costume... Still in the works though.

Looks a bit crap right now, but I'm working on it!!

 However I do have colorings of Bruce's costume. :P

Vest

Jacket... I'm worried about the color scheme...
Does it look too Mardi Gras?
Should I go for a more Avocado Green?

Did I mention that Bruce wants his costume without sleeves? But he does want cuffs... So he's going to be the Mad Hatter were the Mad Hatter a male stripper. *facepalm* Oh well... I guess if I'm going to go for a kind of Pin-up look he can look like a stripper. Lol.


 So, this is where I am at. What'cha think?

My Birthday!!!

I'm going to the Tigers game with Bruce!!!

My Tigers Manicure. I did it myself!

I did a mani pedi 2 days ago, and it still looks awesome if I do say so myself. I'm really excited. I'm heading over to Bruce's now so we can spend the day together. I'll update this post as I have things to say. :)
Update:
Before I left for Bruce's I found money in  a purse I hadn't used in years, which was neat, and I took this picture of myself.

This is what I looked like all day long. I was the birthday princess.
And yes, my bathroom is very girly.

So, Bruce took me to my favorite restaurant for dinner, and I got what I always get, not because I'm boring, (Bruce) but because I love it. And Bruce got a filet. Apparently it was delicious, because I wasn't allowed to touch him while he was eating it, because it would "disrupt the experience"... Yeah, my boyfriend isn't strange at all.

Max Scherzer Pitching

The other pitcher pitching...
I just like this one because you can clearly see the ball.

After Prince's 3 run homer.
AH-MAZING

After the game. They won!! I was soo happy.

And Bruce didn't complain about being at the game at all. He actually said he liked it. So, the master plan of making him a fan of baseball is working... kinda. But the important thing is that we had fun... And that I found money in my purse... Magic money makes everything more awesome.

Clothes Bruce.. Have You Heard of Them??

I Bring You More Weirdness from Emily and I...
Again, she's in blue.... I'm not. Also, any comments I make that were not part of the conversation are highlighted in turquoise.

I have awesome friends

Well, I know I'M awesome. idk about the rest of the people.

Though today I'm feeling very weird

lol

I know you are.

And everyone else is too

Can you turn off my brain?

Ummm... ask someone to whack you with a 2x4, that should do it.

Oh... you didn't want a concussion? Ummm... Then I really don't have any helpful suggestions...

lol

Did you see the shirts I found?

Yeah

They're awesome

I found one for Bruce, lol.

lol bacon?

Here is exactly what I sent him:

http://www.bustedtees.com/onswitch saw this... thought of you... because of your propensity to not wear shirts, I figured you should have a piece that lets people know that you are in fact wearing a shirt.

lol

Because, seriously, when we hang out, he doesn't wear a shirt... like 90% of the time...

lol

and I'm all.... "Clothes Bruce.. have you heard of them?" and then he just looks at me and acts like he's going to take his pants off...

. . . .

And I'm all "Stop that!! I'm a lady and I have delicate sensibilities"

And then he laughs because you just called yourself delicate

Actually that isn't what I say at all..

And then he didn't have to

I just whack him.

lol

But were I to say that I can imagine his reaction... he would look at me like "are you friggin kidding right now?" and then he'd realize I called myself delicate, and then laugh.

Called it

And then he'd harass me about it for the rest of forever.

Like I will be harassing him about the two full fives forever.

lol

None of that singles shit. I want my change in full fives damnit!

I want Scores of full fives!!! You hear me? Scores!

lol  (Apparently I Am HILARIOUS. . . Just Saying.)

I want a full score of full fives.

Yep... His life is going to be hell.

Yup

But yeah... I think I told you that I slipped up and told him that I felt dainty when he held me... he just will not let it die.

Yeah

So I will never again be saying anything of that nature.

Nope

END OF CONVO
Emmy wasn't very vociferous in this part, but it's ok, she got to chat more later about her potential beau... Who I have decided on a whim to call Beau.

Twenty-Two

I turn 22, on the 29th. (Happy Birthday to me!)
My boyfriend, (Man I have got to come up with a decent pseudonym for him... I would go with "The Incredible Hulk" but, A.) that's even longer than typing 'my boyfriend' and B.) that would just add to his already gigantic ego... Oh! I got it, I'll call him Bruce... God I'm a nerd.) is taking me to the Tigers game on my birthday. :D

RAWRRRRR!!!

Now what you all don't know is that Bruce doesn't like baseball... I know, I know... It's Un-American. But, before you guys go after him with pitchforks and torches ablaze, you should know...

This Tiger is very upset you don't like baseball, BRUCE!!!
He's telling the townspeople to grab their torches and pitchforks!

He knows how much I love it, so he'll indulge my need to know about the Tigers, accepts that when we grab lunch or dinner at a place that is broadcasting the Tigers game, I will inevitably get distracted and tune him out to some degree, and he'll occasionally update me on the game if I'm somewhere where I can't watch it.

It would seem you've placated the one, Bruce.
Now you just have to deal with his two buddies...

However, the sweetest thing he's done, thus far, is turn on the TV at his place, and sit down and watch a few innings with me. AT HIS PLACE... He finds the channel the game is on, flips to it, and doesn't touch the remote again. Plus, he cuddles me while he's watching. He's a keeper for sure.

AND NOW?!?! He's taking me to a game, for my BIRTHDAY!!! Not because he'll enjoy it, but because he knows I'll enjoy it. (Hopefully I can get him into it too... *fingers crossed*) Plus it's a night game!!! :D Which is awesome, because A.) If it's chilly I can just cuddle up to him (not that I really need a reason to cuddle, it's just nice to have an excuse sometimes... I'm quite possibly an excessive cuddler...) B.) The eyes in the tigers on top of the score board glow green at night. and C.) What's more romantic than walking through downtown Detroit at night? (Kidding... I just felt like I needed to put more than 2 things in my list this time... Seriously though, if you've never been to/ aren't familiar with how to keep safe in a city, a night game is probably not the best idea for you.)

How cool is he? All lit up and stuff... Can't see the glowy eyes in this picture though.

So, basically I have the best boyfriend ever, and the funny thing is, he was disguised as my best guy friend for a little over 2 years... Who knew?

'Cause it's ONE, TWO, THREE STRIKES, I'm out... :P
Brooke


Also, I grabbed all these pics from Google images, if they're yours and you want credit, just let me know. I have no problem crediting the rightful owner.